In ten years, I have not cried over my grandmother, except in dreams. The truth is, we were born into this digital age.
The only way I can be “real” is through my writing. In my father’s first house we are having dinner. I said the entire body when that happens. Here are two of my many poems about my grandmother: I saw her in my dreams, but I didn’t want to. It was a black and white, candid setting, but she smiled as if posing, nervous and warm, as if caught in mid-twitch. My father kept her picture on his computer desk next to the living room. I always thought that she was disappointed in me. Was I even there? My father cried in front of her grave one year later. Like my own reaction to my grandmother’s death. The ovaries are the female reproductive organs that produce eggs.” This is what Google has to say about ovarian cancer: “Ovarian cancer is cancer that starts in the ovaries. She was killed by ovarian cancer, discovered too late to prevent.
THE LAST MR BIGGS DEAD WINDOWS
It was pin-ball, the sci-fi deep-space pin-ball that has always been a facet of a Windows operating system. I played my first computer game on her office-computer. Now that I think of it, “Deep Space” is emblematic of our extreme isolation in this digital age. Her screensaver was “Deep Space.” It showed thousands of white dots blurring out from the center of the screen, which were meant to represent stars and the movement of a spaceship. I had my first experience with computers at her work. She wore a Chai on a golden chain around her neck until she died. This is what I have to say about a woman who grew stranger after her death: She was adopted. She was buried in a Jewish cemetery in New Haven and her gravestone is in the shape of the Hebrew symbol “Chai.” She was the wife of David Nudelman and the mother of my father and my aunt. This is what society has to say about Gabriela Nudelman: She was a civil engineer. My grandmother does not exist, according to the internet. To what extent is digital technology an alienating influence?Ī Google search for “Gabriela Nudelman Hamden Connecticut” yields nothing pertinent but a webpage from, where another Gabriela Nudelman had set up a profile. My grandmother died on December 15, 2003.